One day, I am going to tell my story.... in raw details. Podcasts maybe... parts of my life in great and gory details.

DADDY ISSUES

He smelled nice, was a neat bloke and being around him seemed like the best place to be. I could tell that Genevieve was deeply in love with this bloke and I also could see that he never loved her back.

She was a piece of shit to him, a girl he used to fill up voids, vacuums he had created for himself by bringing down and terminating every woman he had ever come across... why? He never felt women were to be respected. 

She needed his validity on everything she did... she took him as her god... her life... God forbid she offends him and he'd beat the heck out of her.

He was a liar... a vulture a forbidden excuse of a man who also thought he was God all she needed was someone who could love her and make her feel safe in a world where she was alone. You know? Everyone had her but she didn't have anyone to depend on and she thought she could make a safe haven out of him not knowing she just entered the devil's lair.

More to come......

THE END OF AN ERA

2019, that’s what I’m calling an era. Boy o boy, people really did complain about this year and I also did too before I learned about gratitude and how being grateful can change a lot of negativity, ill-luck and bad energy into good. 

I was recently sent a message and encouraged to continue blogging. I stopped because I was afraid, afraid of so many things, people and what I later realised is that I’m bigger than my fears, bigger than the people who try to put me down. Well, it’s all in the past now. 

As we venture into a new year, I pray that 2020 will be the most amazing year yet filled with amazing blessings and gifts and people. 

Cheers to the new year. Hopefully, this is a first step to resuming my story telling full time 

XOXO 

Sophie

CITI DIARIES

I had always hoped that one day, i'll have enough money to visit most, if not all the cities in the world (except the cities that I'll find myself in harm's way as I'm not ready to die)
Sadly, the Nigerian economy plus my income isn't letting me be great. So I decided to start with cities I've visited in Nigeria and i'll write about the ups and downs, highs and lows, wonderful and crappy places etc....
At this point, I wish I had a camera. Well I'm going to start with the city of my birth "LAGOS" with the hashtag "CITIDIARIES".
Check for deets in my next post. I hope I don't get lazy again and abandon this my blog that craves mt attention alot............

PIZZOUT

Confused!!!

We live and we learn they say but the way of life of people confuse me. I saw stuff on someone's pm on bbm today saying lies keep taking you back to your past but the truth defines your present.
We tend to want to move forward and plunge into greater things but allow hopeless things drag us down. Let go and live!!

THE NIGERIAN WOMAN AND THE CLEAR CUT CASE OF STIGMATIZATION

The world, they say, is a man's world and I think it applies only to the Nigerian people. I sit back and observe things that go on around me and the society I'm in and shake my head, its sad, very sad. No wonder we are backward and civilization is very far from us. We try so hard to be western, act like the westerners, dress like them, talk like them, and try to live like them but mehn!!!! we are far from what it is and have a long way to go.
With stuff I've experienced personally and things happening around me, I guess I've slowly become a feminist. Let me go back to my topic and avoid diversions, why is it that men get away with 98.99% of what our culture forbids when they go against it and women punished for 98.99% of the same offence even at times when they were misjudged or innocent????
Kamdi dated Collins for 7 years and their relationship bloomed with love and respect or so did Kamdi think. She is from a humble normal Nigeria family and Collins was a little bit above the Nigerian middle class. He felt it was the right time for them to get married, went to her dad asked for Kamdi's hand in marriage and then proposed.
Time to meet his family, she prepared a good speech composed herself very well, tried to look good and rehearsed possible questions by herself in the mirror and gave herself answers. You all are familiar with the momma's boy and only son syndrome that disturbs most Nigerian mums and their sons. Collins had this syndrome but never really showed it to Kamdi but of course, why should he?? They were all that mattered to themselves.
Finally, the day came along and the panel she faced consisting of his parents was very tough. She almost changed her mind but he kept assuring her things were ok and he can handle it.
Wedding plans came along and it was tough too but she tried to handle it and it came and went then kasala burst. His mum moved in, monitored her every actions and moves, never saw anything good in what she did. Made her son refuse her from having a social life and working, hit her in his absence and scolded her too much. Kamdi endured and being from a strict Nigerian home had to keep her sanity. One fateful day, he watched his mum do all she was good at doing to his wife, scolded his mum and asked her to leave. Trust typical Nigerian families blaming his act on voodoo, juju and kobnomi. One day, while he was away, they went to his house and threw her out empty handed. Went straight to her family to break the marriage and collect back the bride price.
Collins came back and was summoned by her family and by his actions Kamdi almost died. He had obviously given in to his family's pressure and said to her "I've known my family all my life and you just 9 years, you will find someone else". She almost died within and when her family asked for his reason, Collins didn't have anything concrete to give.
2 years later, Collins remarries his family friend and moves on quickly and Kamdi was totally stigmatized. Most men she met and something serious seemed to be on the line, she opens up about her failed marriage and they end it with her saying "I can't be in a relationship with someone who was once married" at some point it became music to her ears. It's not like she did anything wrong to deserve what she got or she doesn't have what it takes to be a wife, one man even told her he thought she was too nice and her niceness made her seem weak that's why he can't be with her and left her.
This is one of many examples. We are so backward. Nobody cared to ask her what went wrong or even try to find out from neutral people or get to know her better. I keep watching this girl and pray she hasn't given up in love cos she's one person I know that's a true believer of love and radiates it. I hope she finds that man that sees her for who she is.
A man can walk away from a relationship or marriage and get into 29 more without being asked what happened in previous ones even if he was wrong. Please lets wake up and stop thinking like..... I don't even know the word to use......
Hope this helps..... Ciao!!!!
 

RANDOM NOTE

random thought that just went through my head: when it comes to relationships/marriage for our generation, i think our parents' method rocked. they met themselves as random people from friendship grew respect then from respect grew marriage then loyalty then love and it lasted thru the years. then it comes to us, love, friendship, marriage, loyalty then respect and we battle to keep our marriages intact and for some people till death do them part. meeting a total stranger and falling in love with the person seems like a difficult task but try it, it might just work out for u. ciao!!